I went to the Dominican Republic to go to the mall…

The third full day of our Dominican adventure, begins much like the previous 2, Alex wakes up with the chickens (well, peacocks, I haven’t seen a chicken here save for food. At least I hope its chicken they’re feeding us).

So let’s just put it out there right now: Peacocks are some noisy little bastards. If you thought cocks are loud, you should hear a peacock. And gods help you if you get a gaggle of them together. That cacophony is really something with them going back and forth at each other. I like to think they’re playing “Marco Polo.” At least that’s what it sounds like to me. But, it could be the rum talking…

Got my down dog on for a bit, donned the Speedo™ and off with the gang to GABi’s for breakfast.

Post-super fattening omelete (amongst other things), it was time to hang out in a cabana, catch some rays and play in the pool. After a few hours lounging by the pool, Jason and I decide to go check out the mall that’s right outside the resort. Well, it might actually be on the resort grounds and owned by the resort. The architecture of the mall is very much in the style of the resort and there’s a SolMeliã Club store in the mall. The SolMeliã Corporation is the owner of the resort.

Now why the hell would I go to a mall? Aside from checking out some hot Dominican chicks? Well, the trip there was for the geek in me. I was hoping that there was an electronics store inside that I could pick up a cheap wireless router so I could make blogging, surfing the web, etc. easier for all of us.

No such luck. Lots of clothing stores, tourist crap, a cigar/liquor store, a Hard Rock Cafe and something that I thought didn’t exist anymore:

After a quick Internet search, I see that they’re still around. Globally, in fact. 3 in La Republica Dominicana alone. Who knew? I figured after Al Goldstein puked it up on Midnight Blue and gave them a big FU for their shitty food (he really was out of his frakkin’ mind), I just assumed they all went out of business…

I remember watching on Manhattan Cable’s (later Time Warner Cable’s) Public Access, Channel J (then channel 35 later on)…Midnight Blue, The Robin Byrd Show. You know what’s scary about Robin? She’s still on the air. I thought she looked like a post-op tranny over 20 years ago, I shudder to think about what she looks like now. The years weren’t kind to Ms. Byrd back then…but I’m swerving a bit here…The upshot is, who knew Tony Roma’s still existed. I haven’t seen one of those in probably 20 years.

I actually got into trouble with a rent-a-cop at the mall for taking that picture. Apparently, it’s against the law to take pictures of the stores in the mall. People, water and architecture? No problem. Take a picture of a store, you’d think you’d just taken a picture of Don Barzini at Connie’s wedding. Where’s Luca Brasi when you need some muscle for protection? Well, technically, I did have a Marine escort. So I guess that had to do.

Actually, he was nice enough about it. I said sorry and we moved on. Suffice it to say, the picture wasn’t confiscated. Such an odd law (rule?) though. Here’s some shots of the mall:

We were 0-for hot Dominicans and I was SOL on a router. But the mall looked nice. So we headed back to the pool. One the way, we came across this:

There were several weddings going on here at the resort. Pretty much every day.

Boozin' in the pool

When we got back to the pool, this is what we find our wives doing. It was a major theme over our week in Punta Cana.

Dinner was at El Guarapo Dominican Restaurant. I can only assume that the cuisine was traditional Dominican. It was very good. I had this really tasty pork dish. And finally, all of the chorizo they’ve been feeding us as appetizers all week actually fits in with the food we’re eating for dinner.

There was a dollhouse in the restaurant. Not sure why. Looked like a plantation house.

I’ll post some shots of it below.

After dinner, was actually an early night. No late night partying here. Just a dip in the jacuzzi and off to bed because on Wednesday, we’re going on our 1 excursion off the resort for the week.

Here’s some more Tuesday pictures…